Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
You drunk dialed me talking about the stages of mitosis. There is no way you didn't ace your bio final
I never had a problem I couldn't slut my way out of.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Like these jerks could have told me it wasn't a video call, I wouldn't have put on pants.
Enjoy the penises
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
The sex was totally worth how awkward its gonna be for the next few weeks
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