Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
im sitting at a bagel shop wearing a princess crown hungover and have a sweater that is not mine.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i could think was her face looked like a farm accident
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
We got really stoned and then we fucked. Then he made me a panini.
Oooh, he sounds pretty classy
Actually, not at all. We were stoned so he made me a peanut butter panini. With a Rollo in the middle of it. And he left the panini press on all night. I could have died.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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