Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
checking your phone to see who you drunk dialed last night isnt as funny when you see you had a 17 minute call to your dad.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
you know what its like when everyone is chanting "do it, do it"...still friends?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
I just passed a drug test. I want to shout that from the top of a mountain. Can we have beers on the top of a mountain?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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