I feel like if im whacking off more now that i have a gf than i did when i was single, somethings wrong.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
there needs to be a build-a-bong store...
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
And then he peed in my hair
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