Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
Fact: Telling a guy he has erectile dysfunction doesn't solve the problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want a grilled cheese and an IV
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
We're gonna have screwdrivers in a cab at 4am?
Is that weird?
Some guy just showed up at my door to return my bikini top. EXPLAIN NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
I was trying to pee in the bushes and the person who lived in the house where the bushes were planted started knocking on the window to get me to stop peeing in their bushes
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
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