That was a long time ago. She needed the money.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
We just passed a billboard that said to join "jerseydoesntstink.com" and literally 15 seconds later, we could smell jersey.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
One of my other friends found me and the dog in the back seat of this one guy's car....I don't even know
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
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