i totally forgot about the coupon that said i would show him how i pleasure myself.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
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I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That's why god made go-pro's and tequila
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
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