But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just got cockblocked by a guy drinking wine straight out of the bottle with a straw...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
My mom just came into the kitchen and watched me take a double shot of whiskey and chase it with a beer and said "you are my son." Proudest family moment ever
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She insisted on cleaning her room in the dark. 5 minutes in, she forgot what she was doing and started putting shirts on instead of hanging them up.
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
He asked me if I've ever had my ass ate and there was no polite way to say yeah your brother's pretty in to that 😂 I went with "no"
Ok here's the plan: birth control, KFC, handcuffs.
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