I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
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I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Bombed my 8 a.m. exam and the liquor store doesn't open till noon. Drinking unfinished beers from last night till they open.
He knew exactly who I'd slept with after just one look at my crotch. He's like the Sherlock Holmes of cocks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
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