she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
So I went to have a snack...can you please tell me why there's a condom in the hummus?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
He ended our Skype call with, "I'm going to poop and then go play my ukulele in the park."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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