we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
yeah a little bit of me felt bad about it. But the rest of me was having sex with him.
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Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Oh, honey. If you're seeing a girl just for the sex, never doubt that she knows and she's doing the same thing. We're not stupid, we're just craftier than you.
Cool. Some 22 year old kids gave me a ride home from the bar last night. In related news, I made out with a 22yr old last night. He was adorable
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
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Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I know that you sometimes make decisions based on comedic effect, but losing your virginity shouldn't be one of them.
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
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