apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Last time I checked he was house sitting for his ex while she was out of town with some new dude. He was crying about how the guy told him to stay out of his whiskey while he was gone. That's whipped
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
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