in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
We are two peas in an std pod
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I'm praying that the company stray cat shows up tomorrow. I think I may have hit it while leaving Friday. Nobody will believe it was an accident after I hit the last one.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
Both of us came out of our rooms at the same time in boxers and sat on the couch. No words were spoken.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
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