I'm gonna cuddle the shit out of you tomorrow
their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
I asked him if his doormat had a name, then proceeded to sit on it for the next 30 minutes while signing that magic carpet ride song from aladdin.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know how to make vodka btw in case you want to come over and do a science project
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Randomize