every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
i wish that high-me and normal-me were two different ppl so that high-me could thank normal-me for setting out a feast before smoking
I wish that high-you wouldn't text me stupid shit at 3:30 in the morning
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
"thanks for the sex" was written in lipstick on my bathroom mirror. i'm officially done with random hook ups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just gave himself a boner while driving using "the power of his mind"
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
He wanted to have sex in a church because he has keys to it from court-ordered community service. WHAT IS STANDARDS?
Its okay that he doesn't remember you, he only remembers girls by their boobs and I think you were wearing a jacket
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
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