My boobs aren't big enough for this kind of lifestyle
You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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