I hope you have a really shitty weekend. I love you.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
my door was closed and her door was closed but even over the r.kelly playing at full blast i was able to hear her say "THAT'S NOT THE RIGHT HOLE!". Def rethinking my roommate situation.
I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
The fact that a spice girls song is stuck in my head is a great sign that my decisions aren't the right ones at the moment...
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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