I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
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Just saw a girl trying to crack an egg with her butt cheeks. I think I know what we're doing thursday night.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
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Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
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