so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
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Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
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First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
You're incredible, and I'm drunk
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
Everybody at Lexi's party found out I'm both a screamer and a moaner after he ate me out on the pool table downstairs. Just another sunday night in Alaska
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