Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
So you know how craigslist used to have an "erotica" section? And how after you click on a link it changes a darker color? And how Dad stays up really late most nights?
Oh god... well at least he's gettin some. Mom's a prude.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Costco cheesecake and whisky. A night made in heaven
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
Is texting an old booty call with "can you still get your ankles behind your ears?" an appropriate way to reemerge into the singles scene???
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
I don't feel like that was meant as a compliment, but really still feels like one
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