just got 3 freshman girls to makeout with each other at a toga party! score!
why is this not a picture message?!?!
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
You said your legs stopped working and then pulled yourself around the floor with your hands.
That explains the wood chips stuck in my nipples.
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
that's how you measure success
By how bad my vagina hurts on a Tuesday morning while I'm trying to figure out how I got white girl wasted on a Monday?
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
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