Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
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