maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
just realized the sink is the perfect height to piss into never cleaning the toilet again
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I'm sneaking you alcohol into a hospital. This either says love or "we have a problem"
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
I just made the most “single life” Amazon order ever: protein bars and condoms.
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Just stalked the girl I hooked up with last night's boyfriend. He seems nice, I approve.
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