i don't know how boys match. i think shoes & belt are the only thing. it doesn't matter. i just know if they look stupid.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
I answered the booty call in my Trophy Wife cutoff and my ex-boyfriends sweatpants with a bottle of jager.
and how was that received?
We were literally making dick jokes with his dick out
That’s the level of friends with benefits I aspire to achieve
Randomize