New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
I'm not making any promises. But if I start throwing food at you, just go with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
Wors thing about having a cop dad: random drug testing
I just remembered something. Did we really all flash the cab driver to get half off?
are you just inviting me because you can't afford an actual stripper?
No more chicken and waffles served by drag queens at 2 AM. :(
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize