VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Nothing says Happy Thanksgiving like having to pee in a condom for my cousin so that he can pass a drug test.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
I've officially slept through a hurricane, a tornado and had sex during an earthquake. I'm surviving.
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