Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Randomize