Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
And then he asked the cop "shall i shut off the lady gaga?" as he was being frisked.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
I discovered moonshine and fell in love.
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