Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
foreskin is a definite game changer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
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