she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
His facebook interests include 'unstrapping velcro'.
it was really awkward..i thought he had two dicks, but later realized it was jsut his roommate
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
His Instagram is like a gay porn blog all of the sudden got conquered by the Mormon missionary that he is
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