yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
Some guys phone started vibrating on the tv. I answered mine. That's how high I am.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
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