I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.
We decided to smoke and then made crosses on our foreheads for ash wednesday
mom would be proud
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I NEED TO NOT REMEMBER THIS IN THE MORNING. He is our TEACHER.
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
He tried to fight me not realizing that I work as a bouncer in the the same bar we were in. His night ended with him in handcuffs, missing teeth, PLUS I got his shots that he ordered since he didn't get to drink them.
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
How the hell could he be confused. He had a naked girl running to him. I feel like he would enjoy that.
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
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