can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
so I woke up and found tortilla in my belly button
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Oh my god did you actually lose a tooth
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
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