i'm only drinking out of pineapples from now on.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
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Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
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I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
I don’t know what language he speaks but I know my boobs will translate just fine
I’m looking forward to few days of international relations
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