Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
My mom is making me buy a single zucchini, I look like someone who can't afford a dildo
this is like black Friday for my dealer. I'm literally standing in line.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not normal to lose a tooth eating a McDouble.
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
My brain is like scrambled eggs. If scrambled eggs were trying to escape out of my skull through my forehead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
Randomize