her name was charlotte except you kept calling her chatroulette and yelling at her to show you her boobs
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
I think we should roll her a welcome back, sorry your godmom's on life support blunt.
Stole a wheelchair from the hospital and rolled down the street smoking and drinking this is my weekend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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