Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
Hold on im havin a staring contest with my cat
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Drunk sex destroyed my coffee table... ikea this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Things I want for my birthday 1. a Chipotle grade tortilla steamer 2. a new liver
Cops on bikes. I think I can outrun them.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
Changed all my ex bf's names to "no" in my phone so the next time I try to drunk text one of them it'll basically be like Russian roulette
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
I may have been bent over an elementary school lunch table a few weeks ago. Don't judge.
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