I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
What!? It's 7:30am on gameday. This keg is not going to drink itself.
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
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