And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
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These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I can't get over how you look like his sister and he wants to fuck you.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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