I just dry heaved the smell of jagerbombs....which proceeded to make me hurl for real.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
It's like all the guys I keep around if I wanna have sex with all got mad at the same time. I guess I'll get out my vibrator again.
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