I'm driving in the middle of nowhere, and I just saw a stuffed Barney hanging from a noose on a tree. Maybe I should turn around.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
Hey do you think you can sew an adult onsie with easy access if you know what I mean!!?? It must have bunny feet.
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize