he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
He passed out so we kept throwing water on him, he got excited and asked if we were at the wave pool.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yes my plan is to drink the college out of me so i can be an adult by monday
As far as figuring life out your talking to a guy that's alternating text messages between his baby mama and a drunk bitch I met tailgating. My best advice is don't worry about shit out of your control and always and I really mean ALWAYS wear a condom.
We were on the balcony tossing jello shots to people passing below
When people said no i'd yell "i tried them i promise they aren't roofied!"
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I learn from experience and I experienced what it would be like to completely lose my mind and then wake up with a stab wound.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
Told him I just wanted to be friends. He responded, "The best marriages are born from great friendships." Please come get me.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Randomize