Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
all i know is i woke up with a braid in my hair and i vaguely remember a cab driver telling me he would give me $10,000 to get him a green card. and he would take me to turkey. and give me free cab rides. im never drinking on my medicine again. lol.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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