I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
I just told the 2nd grade class leprechauns are the children of midgets.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
For a day that started with shitting my pants, things turned out fairly well.
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
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