Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
dude if Megan calls say you Sis was house sitting for me yesterday , she f'n found dana's panties
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
Totally just locked myself outside of my house, in my robe, with the fedex man and a box of sex toys. Not my week.
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize