why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
I had to explain the gravity bong to my mom. Right after she pointed out I have a lot of dicks on my floor at any given moment.
I fucked my ex boyfriend to get shrooms for you guys
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had to pick up my "let's drink and make bad choices" hat, my banana suit and beer pong table from work. Until just then I couldn't figure out why I got fired.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
Randomize