I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
Just hide your weed in your baby brothers shirt. TSA wont check a baby, thats fucked up
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
I just don't understand why we can't have sex in the house. I'll come see you but I'll have to think about the barn thing.
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Randomize