if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
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