So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Dude, I got drunk and sexted his little sister by accident
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
I would just like to say that I was the one who said that we should find scissors, when they were cutting your hair with a kitchen knife. I am responsible.
I still feel bad for it, even though I technically only videotaped it and helped will to distract the questioning neighbor
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