found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
since you saved your number in my phone as "the hot chick you met last Friday" I don't know who you are either
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have no idea where I am, where my pants are, there is cheese stuck to my ass.. Why do I have your phone?
shot for shot with some guy twice your age to prove Detroit hustles harder then you left with him. We're tracking you
it doesn't matter, he's just a life support system for his dick
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize